Case Studies

I was born in Sierra Leone and lived with my mother and sister. I was cut when I was 8 years old. I was told that there will be a grand ceremony and they bought me a very pretty dress. They invited a lot of other women and there was music and dance. Then the women took me into an empty room and one came behind me and pinned me to the floor by pressing my shoulders hard. Another held my left leg and a third held my right leg. At that point I started panicking and asked them to release me. They did not listen. My mother has disappeared and the only familiar face was that of my auntie who kept on telling me to lie down and be quiet. A very old lady came in sat in front of my opened legs and opened a piece of cloth. She took out a blade and started cutting me. The pain was excruciating. I started screaming. I tried with all my strength to free my legs but the two women holding me, held harder and harder and I kept screaming. The woman kept on cutting. I think I fainted at that point.

I felt betrayed by my mother and did not want to talk to her. She told me that when I grew up I would be able to have children safely and my husband would love me.

Since that day I had a lot of pain when I passed water and when I started having a period I would scream from the pain sometimes. I never felt anything when my husband came to my bed at night. I cleaned his house, cooked for him and he forced me to sleep with him all the time. It hurt a lot. I could not have children; it might have been a result of the cutting. My husband left me because he had the right to take another wife and because he said I brought him bad luck.

I was at a really low point in my life, I had nobody. I found out about Ashiana and arranged to meet a worker. The worker I had was very kind and knew a lot about FGM, I felt like I could talk to her and didn’t have to explain myself. I have received support for over a year now and feel much better about my life. I have accessed health support and emotional support and am training to become a volunteer with Ashiana. My aim is to raise awareness alongside the workers in the communities which are affected by FGM. I hope that I can help other girls and women so that they don’t have to go through what I have been through.

Zara is 19 years old and is profoundly deaf from birth. She is British born from a Pakistani background. She is living with her parents and brother and has an older married sister. She is the only deaf member of the family. Zara came to Ashiana to seek help after her parents told her that she is to be married off to her cousin in Pakistan and he would come to live with her here in England.

Through adapted communication tools and interpreters, Ashiana were able to communicate with Zara. She explained that this was the first time she had been able to communicate freely with someone away from her family and college due to her communication restrictions.

Zara told her worker that she is in love with a young man who wants to marry her but not until she has finished college. She wants to be able to get a degree and work. However her parents told her that she is going to be married off in Pakistan to her cousin.

She was absolutely distressed. She wanted to know whether there was a way to prevent it from happening.

Her worker explained to Zara about the Forced Marriage Order that we could obtain as well as informing the Airport Authorities in case she is taken to Pakistan before we manage to obtain the FMO.

Zara decided that she did not want to go down the FMO route at this time but was happy to now know that she cannot be forced into marrying her cousin. Zara continued to access support through Ashiana and is no longer at risk of forced marriage. She was supported to speak to her parents and informed them that she knows her rights and there are organisations that will help her if they try to force her to marry.

She still has plans to marry her boyfriend and she is studying hard in order to make a better life for herself.

I am a young Pakistani girl now aged 17. I have lived most of my life in Germany. In 2008 when I was sixteen I was sent to Pakistan after having failed my exams. My father decided to send me to Pakistan on the pretence that I was going to visit my mother but then he refused to let me go back to Germany.

After five months my father also decided to join us in Pakistan. Within one week of his arrival, he told me that he had found me someone to marry. The young boy was one of my father’s friend’s sons from a rural village.

I explained to my father that I was too young to get married but he was very angry and accused me of bringing shame and dishonour to the family. My father told me that he was ashamed of me because I had failed my exams. To add to my heartache a few days later my father divorced my mother and threw her out of the family house. I felt responsible for this and it made me feel ill and stressed. I knew things could get a lot worse.

My brother and sister were also summoned to Pakistan by my father and I realised that this must be to do with the wedding. I wanted to see my mother and decided to go and visit her; she was living with one of her relatives. When I was with her she received a phone call from her brother and sister. They were putting pressure on her to go back home. Her brother even threatened to kill her. I had the full support of my mother, she didn’t want me to get married at such a young age but I was very scared about what would happen to me and what they would do to my mother. The family kept putting pressure on me to accept the proposal for marriage.

I attended a wedding where I met some of my mother’s relatives who were from Britain. I was so desperate and confided in one of them. I explained about my current situation and asked him if he could help me to escape. I told him that I had British passport so he decided to help me. He gave me the British High Commission telephone number and I contacted them. Someone from the High Commission met me and took me to an unknown location. I stayed there for three weeks until my mother’s relative tried to find accommodation/safe place for me in Britain. Three weeks later, he had arranged accommodation for me with Ashiana. I arrived in Britain and was taken to Ashiana. I was supported by them emotionally and also practically, they helped me to access to education and benefits. When I was ready, they supported me to find my own accommodation. I continue to study and now look forward to my future.